Que j'aime la vie!
If life is a gift, shouldn't we be thankful for it? Everyday we wake up, the gift is given again, it is still available, so I think we should say thank you to God everyday.
The only certainty about life is death, why be afraid of it?
Just wanted offer the reflection, I don't have an answer for it. But I can say that I am thankful for my life, I say thank you regularly, even more these past few months. And I am not afraid of dying, I don't think I ever was actually. I don't know why? Maybe I feel like there will be some sort of continuity to what I call me.
Here are a few more pictures of northern Thailand, some of them are in relation with yesterday's post, as of now I am up to date with the pictures and my travel. I have spent way to much time in front of a computer the past two days, but feel good about sharing every time I do. I have spent time alone, yesterday and today, and I have to say I am looooovvvviing it. I keep thinking where will I go when I go back to Canada? I want to find a place where I will be quiet, yet I love being close to a big city. I guess Moncton, N.-B. could be a good option, city-ish, yet quiet and close to the beach. My concern with it is that I am not recognize for my massage there, and training would be somewhere around $10 000, but then again, why worry, I know I love massage and I love learning about it.
I also have realized in the last few days that when I spend time alone, in silence for a while, words seems to become more powerful. A simple thank you, a paragraph in a good book, the lyrics of a song. I think we overuse words, we talk about nothing important just to fill silence, and mostly we talk about negative stuff or we complain. What if we had a counter and would be allowed only so many words a day, so many words in our entire life, would we wast them on meaningless things?
I think this is what I love about being alone, I choose the vibrations I am in, the words I listen to, the words I read. I have always despised the news for that reason, they are filled with negative vibes, and fear. And to me the saddest part about it is that people are watching the news first thing in the morning and last thing at night. No wonder we live in a society that is so filled with fears and worries. I have not had cable tv for many years for the same reason. I stilled watched tv, renting movies or streaming from the web, but at least then I would choose what to watch, I would choose the emotions I wanted to feel. I think we watch tv to feel emotions that we don't get to experience in our daily life. Come to think of it, I have not missed tv since I am on my journey.
One more thing about being alone is starting my day with a moment of intention for the day. I forget about it when someone else is there. I have a moment of gratitude for where I am, for my health, and for the fact that I can do whatever I want to without impacting anyone else. Then I set an intention for the day, today it is finding a meditation course, that the right teacher comes my way (of course I will search for the place, just that I find the one I need). I do that automatically when I get up alone, and I don't think of it if someone else is there... interesting! I'll reflect upon that. Why do I put myself aside when someone else is there? Why do I feel oblige to please, why do I feel guilty when I don't please is a better question. Guilt is such a powerful yet negative vibe. I think I could write a full post about guilt, maybe I will, maybe it would help me exorcise it. And as much as I feel oblige to please, it is getting to me more and more. I am not happy about putting myself aside but I don't know how to express it. Don't know how to say this is what I want. So I do stuff that I don't really feel like doing when I'm with other people, then I get bitter about it. I know where my need to please comes from, but I don't get that I have not changed that in the last years.
We all have stuff to heal, I am healing a past of not being liked, of being ridiculed, of being rejected, because I was different. But that was only for a few years at school, since I am 18 and have been blessed with amazing people around me, with friends that I can count on, that likes me for who I am, no matter what. And even with them sometimes I put myself aside, not sure why. Deep down I know they will still love me. So my intention for the next few days will be to learn how to express my needs better. To do and say what I want, even when I am with people. Maybe I need to except I am different in more ways then one, and that as much as I am a social person I would rather be alone then to compromise my truth to be with others.
I don't know why this is what I am sharing today, but I hope some of that will resonate with some of you.
I love you!
I love myself!
Smile, it makes everything better, and love yourself, you are beautiful as you are!
Enjoy the pics!
May life cover you with love, may the rain of sunshine opens your harts to the beauty around you. I love you!
Big hug!!!
If life is a gift, shouldn't we be thankful for it? Everyday we wake up, the gift is given again, it is still available, so I think we should say thank you to God everyday.
The only certainty about life is death, why be afraid of it?
Just wanted offer the reflection, I don't have an answer for it. But I can say that I am thankful for my life, I say thank you regularly, even more these past few months. And I am not afraid of dying, I don't think I ever was actually. I don't know why? Maybe I feel like there will be some sort of continuity to what I call me.
Here are a few more pictures of northern Thailand, some of them are in relation with yesterday's post, as of now I am up to date with the pictures and my travel. I have spent way to much time in front of a computer the past two days, but feel good about sharing every time I do. I have spent time alone, yesterday and today, and I have to say I am looooovvvviing it. I keep thinking where will I go when I go back to Canada? I want to find a place where I will be quiet, yet I love being close to a big city. I guess Moncton, N.-B. could be a good option, city-ish, yet quiet and close to the beach. My concern with it is that I am not recognize for my massage there, and training would be somewhere around $10 000, but then again, why worry, I know I love massage and I love learning about it.
I also have realized in the last few days that when I spend time alone, in silence for a while, words seems to become more powerful. A simple thank you, a paragraph in a good book, the lyrics of a song. I think we overuse words, we talk about nothing important just to fill silence, and mostly we talk about negative stuff or we complain. What if we had a counter and would be allowed only so many words a day, so many words in our entire life, would we wast them on meaningless things?
I think this is what I love about being alone, I choose the vibrations I am in, the words I listen to, the words I read. I have always despised the news for that reason, they are filled with negative vibes, and fear. And to me the saddest part about it is that people are watching the news first thing in the morning and last thing at night. No wonder we live in a society that is so filled with fears and worries. I have not had cable tv for many years for the same reason. I stilled watched tv, renting movies or streaming from the web, but at least then I would choose what to watch, I would choose the emotions I wanted to feel. I think we watch tv to feel emotions that we don't get to experience in our daily life. Come to think of it, I have not missed tv since I am on my journey.
One more thing about being alone is starting my day with a moment of intention for the day. I forget about it when someone else is there. I have a moment of gratitude for where I am, for my health, and for the fact that I can do whatever I want to without impacting anyone else. Then I set an intention for the day, today it is finding a meditation course, that the right teacher comes my way (of course I will search for the place, just that I find the one I need). I do that automatically when I get up alone, and I don't think of it if someone else is there... interesting! I'll reflect upon that. Why do I put myself aside when someone else is there? Why do I feel oblige to please, why do I feel guilty when I don't please is a better question. Guilt is such a powerful yet negative vibe. I think I could write a full post about guilt, maybe I will, maybe it would help me exorcise it. And as much as I feel oblige to please, it is getting to me more and more. I am not happy about putting myself aside but I don't know how to express it. Don't know how to say this is what I want. So I do stuff that I don't really feel like doing when I'm with other people, then I get bitter about it. I know where my need to please comes from, but I don't get that I have not changed that in the last years.
We all have stuff to heal, I am healing a past of not being liked, of being ridiculed, of being rejected, because I was different. But that was only for a few years at school, since I am 18 and have been blessed with amazing people around me, with friends that I can count on, that likes me for who I am, no matter what. And even with them sometimes I put myself aside, not sure why. Deep down I know they will still love me. So my intention for the next few days will be to learn how to express my needs better. To do and say what I want, even when I am with people. Maybe I need to except I am different in more ways then one, and that as much as I am a social person I would rather be alone then to compromise my truth to be with others.
I don't know why this is what I am sharing today, but I hope some of that will resonate with some of you.
I love you!
I love myself!
Smile, it makes everything better, and love yourself, you are beautiful as you are!
Enjoy the pics!
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| 719 steps to sunrise! |
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| Chiang Rai, where we were for the sunrise |
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| Chiang Rai |
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| Chiang Rai - coming back from the sunrise |
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| Chiang Rai village |
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| Chaing Rai Market |
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| Breakfast in the market, Chiang Rai |
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| View from the temple in Tha Ton |
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| Most gas stations are modern, but some, in more rural area are like this. |
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| Road side somewhere between Tha Ton and Chiang Dao |
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| Road side somewhere between Tha Ton and Chiang Dao |
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| Road side somewhere between Tha Ton and Chiang Dao |
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| Road side somewhere between Tha Ton and Chiang Dao |
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| Chiang Dao |
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| Chiang Dao |
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| Chiang Dao - Isn't she beautifully old!!! |
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| There is a 14km cave in this mountain, I didn't do the full visit, got there to late, it was still impressive. |
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| Same mountain |
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| I am in Mother Earth! lol |
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| Entrance of the cave... then stairs leads you down. I wish I would of had more time to visit more of, it still was pretty impressive! |
Big hug!!!
Thanks for sharing. You are one in a million. Where ever you'll end up, you will be happy and content ... you have such a good outlook on life. Keep on sending us lots of love. Don't forget to come back to Ottawa from time to time ... it will be so wonderful if you would return here !!!
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